Doctor Who has ruined me (aka why people think I'm weird)
- See dust in the sunlight: It's the Vashta Nerada
- Something in my eye: The Weeping Angels are in me
- See a crack in a wall: Prisoner Zero has escaped
- See a Roman Centurion: RORY
- Can't remember why I'm crying: Oh god, I've forgotten my husband
- See a ginger-haired person: THE ULTIMATE GINGE
- See a statue: DON'T BLINK
- Can't open a door: Crimson eleven delight petrichor
- See fishfingers: CUSTARD
- See custard: FISHFINGERS
- See a bowtie: Bowties are cool
- See a fez: Fezzes are cool
- See glasses: Hello handsome
- Someone made a soufflé: OSWIN
- See a wheelie bin: MICKEY?
- Go to a wedding: DRUNK GIRAFFE DANCE
- Morning comes too soon: THE UNIVERSE IS SHRINKING
- On a beach: And this is the story of how I died
- The clock breaks: Run to the fireplace
- Have to go to bed: but I COULD DO SO MUCH MORE
- See a poncho: Peruvian folk band
- See sunflowers: FOR AMY
- Shoes: Always converse
- Praying: Dear Santa
- See a really fat person: Go get the vinegar
- Accomplish something: WHO DA MAN?
- Something doesn't make sense: Let's go poke it with a stick
- Someone asks my name: STORMAGEDDON, DARK LORD OF ALL
- Forget something: THE SILENCE
- See a tally chart: THE SILENCE
- Can't hear anything: SILENCE
- A shop mannequin moves: Autons
- Gas lights flicker: Ghosts in the gas.
- See the words "Bad Wolf": It's a sign!
- Robed monks: Werewolf assassination plot
- Someone on TV says they're hungry: They're trying to steal your face.
- Something moves in the mirror: It's the Daughter Of Blood!
- Weight loss pills: Alien reproductive system
- Knocking on the wall: But the light is extonic!
- Someone tells you to turn left: You're trying to doom us all!
- "Are you my mummy?": Run. Just run.
